118

I’ve been practicing yoga lately:

I know it’s not good to show off, but I’m impressed by myself!

117

I fucking hate American Women..

(but if you’re reading this, I most likely dont hate you)

You do WHAT for a living???

I got a job finally. And not just ANY job, the BEST JOB IN THE WORLD (note the sarcasm).

Yes that’s right; along with every 14 year old girl in Rohnert Park, I now work at Cold Stone Creamery™.

Yeah it’s a shitty job, yeah I’m too old. BUT, what job can you go to work COMPLETLY HIGH off your ass, and function not only well, but BETTER because you just don’t care anymore. They reward apathy, and punish individual thinking. It’s hell for me.

Somehow, though, I just don’t care. Sure I’m a 19 year old loser who works minimum wage with some little high school girls, but whatever.

I’m only in college, and what the hell else do I have going for me? I need some spending money, and I make enough on tips to keep my pockets full of cash.

115

For some reason I think a lot of people think my name is Martin.

Dreams

I think my first dream about eating a hotdog in a bun in great detail says something about my current state of mind.

More specifically, I think I’m crazy…

What is love?

If someone on the street came and told you they loved you, what would you think?

If your best friend of the same gender as yourself told you they loved you, what would you think?

If your best friend of the opposite gender told you they loved you, how would you react?

This is what I have observed in America:

It seems that most people wouldn’t think twice if a random person told them they loved them, and they would probably laugh it off nervousily and think that person is crazy, kidding, or just trying to get a rise out of them.
Most people would react happily to their best friend of the same gender telling them they loved them, knowing that their best friend wouldn’t say such a thing without really meaning it. It also would likely have NO sexual undertones of any kind (barring certain situations).
Yet, try telling a person of the opposite sex you love them. They’ll immedietly think sexual thoughts. If they feel such thoughts towards you, there will be a drive to either have sex or to “date.” If they do not feel sexual thoughts for you, they are likely to think that you are, and that you have some sort of desire to be intimate sexually with them.

Therein lies the underlying problem: the word love is really a few different emotions, covered by the same word in our language. There are three separate emotions I have identified, that the word “love” covers:

1. Sexual-Based love, such as that between 2 people who have engaged in intercourse, or other sexual based activites with each other. Example: A boyfriend of 6 months is struggling if it is the right time to tell his girlfriend that he loves her. He knows that the word “love” has a huge social meaning to the female, and to their relationship, and he knows that doing so will project the relationship further closer.
2. The love between a family member, or a close longtime friend. This kind of love is based upon relationships and sometimes obligation. It stems from longterm intimacy (NOT sexual intimacy, just plain intimacy) Example: A child to his/her mother: “I love you Mommy”
3. Universal Love. My kind of love. The love one feels for their fellow beings, mankind, animals, plants, etc. This kind of love is not often felt by the general population, at least from what i’ve observed. It’s the love you feel when you realise that everything on earth is connected in the most intimate and special way. It is also my experience that the more of this love you feel, the more you get back. Example: St. Francis of Assisi spent a large amount of his life outside and in nature. He truely LOVED the animals and all mankind.

I don’t know, maybe I’m the only one who feels this, but I think our society really has a problem with love. At the minimum we should have 3 separate words for the different kinds of love. I would be willing to bet that there are many other cultures that have separate words for all these kinds of love, and kinds I can’t even describe with our language.

Anyone have thoughts on this? I’m curious to see what other people think.

112

It’s probably a mistake to host a video on LJ but I just wanted everyone to see the cutest thing in the world.

It’s my baby brother, Dominic, discovering laughter for one of the first times. REAL laughter. Look at how much fun he’s having!

-Download Here-

111

Depression.

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110

So today I saw the movie Big Fish.

Wow. What a movie. VERY complex story, FULL of metaphors. I dont think I caught about half the connections. Everyone who sees it will probably get something different out of it. I’m still digesting it.

My new drug: peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Baby X. Isn’t he cute!?! (and fat!)

109

Damn I was eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich at my computer desk and I got some peanut butter on my mouse and now it’s stuck in the crack.

Crap.

And my mouth is full of peanut butter.

I feel like I’m in one of those “Got Milk?” commercials.