Life is weird sometimes.

I’m lonely.

Posted: May 12th, 2003 | Author: admin | Filed under: LJ | 2 Comments »

I decided that I am really really lonely.

I have lots of good friends and they mean a lot to me. But I need someone in my life to be intimate with. Not intimate sexually, but intimate in two ways:

1. I want to have someone to hug and hold when I am feeling blue. It would be nice to be able to fall asleep holding someone or being held. Not even in a sexual way, it’s not even about that.
2. I want to have someone that I can tell all my stupid little secrets to. I tell Jon a lot, but I need someone else, preferably a girl.

I’m not really looking for a “relationship” at the current moment. I also am not looking for a “fuck buddy” either.

And I can’t just settle for some bimbo off the street. I have really high standards and not just anyone will do.

Maybe I need to be more active in looking for a “relationship?” Maybe that’s the only way I will get what I want.

For the time being I will just try and strengthen my current friendships and see if that helps any. I think I just need to realize how great my friends are.

I am so confused right now….

But it will all work out good in the end, I know it will.

2 Comments on “I’m lonely.”

  1. 1 roxy99ed said at 6:13 pm on May 11th, 2003:

    I consider you one of my best friends Ryan.

    And I think that everyone feels like that sometimes. You are a great guy so I am sure you will find someone no problem. I bet you will find someone when you least expect it. It takes time.

  2. 2 187killa said at 1:33 pm on May 21st, 2003:

    yes so true, i think the best things happen to people when they least except it

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